Marriages are never easy and whether we like it or not, stress will find its way into even the healthiest of relationships. Traumatic life events and even everyday challenges can often cause imbalances in a relationship, leading to marital issues and eventually divorce. Being aware of these factors and knowing how to spot any red flags when they arise can be essential when determining whether or not a problem exists.

While there are countless reasons why couples decide to separate, the following five are some of the most reported factors contributing to divorce:

#5 Living Apart

Being separated can take its toll on any relationship, and marriages are no exception. Studies show that living apart, be it due to careers or familial obligations, can leave couples doubting the strength of the relationship. When compared to their civilian counterparts, military couples especially tend to experience an increase in marital strife when separated by deployments, relocations, and the like. In these types of cases, there are often a lot of other contributing factors as well, such as stress, PTSD, and other issues that can arise both during deployments as well as after the homecoming.

It’s also important to note that not all couples who live apart will experience trouble. For some, distance is not an issue, and when both individuals have the same level of comfort with the arrangement, the result can be just fine. However, it’s not uncommon for living apart to raise questions of trust and fidelity, which can cause emotional separation as well as the obvious physical distance.

#4 Job Changes

Unemployment or changes in an individual’s job situation is yet another common reason why couples eventually call it quits. According to a recent study performed by Ohio State University, men and women are more likely to leave their spouses when the man is unemployed. However, job loss is certainly not the only “change” that can cause issues.

In reality, any alteration in a couple’s financial situation or schedule can cause a problem which may lead to irreconcilable differences in the future. With each new job comes new responsibilities, and it’s all too common for jobs to become priority one while the marriage falls to the back burner.

#3 Having a Baby

Kids can be a big point of contention for many couples. Even for those spouses who agree on whether or not to have kids and how many kids they wish to have, the challenges are certainly far from over. The stress of caring for a newborn and for young children can leave quite a mark on a marriage. In fact, according to the Journal of Family Psychology, approximately 67 percent of all couples admitted a decline in their marital bliss within the first few years of their child’s life. The birth of a child and the readjusting to a new routine and schedule can be especially difficult for those parents who’re already prone to stress, anxiety, or depression.

#2 Illness

Illness is yet another common cause for discord between spouses. When a spouse becomes sick, especially if the illness is a prolonged one, it’s often necessary for the other spouse to take on more responsibilities and ramp up their efforts in the relationship. From increased financial stress to the overall pain of it all, illness can have a wide and varied impact on the couple and their marriage.

There is some evidence that suggests that the sickness of a female spouse can have a more detrimental effect on the marriage. According to a study performed by Iowa State University, couples were six percent more likely to get divorced when the wife had a serious illness, such as heart disease or cancer.

#1 Infidelity

Infidelity can have an enormous impact on any relationship, be the affair physical or emotional. While some couples are able to work through an affair and even use the incident as a catalyst for seeking the help they need, acts of betrayal such as these are often seen by the offended party as the “straw that broke the camel’s back”, leading the couple to divorce. In particular, affairs that have gone on for extended periods are often the hardest for couples to work past.

New Trend Among Elderly

Young couples are not the only couples getting divorced these days. There are an increasing number of late-life divorces.   According to the National Center for Family and Marriage Research, just last year people 50 and over were twice as likely to seek a divorce than in 1990. The number of divorces were even greater at age 65 and older. This is an interesting phenomenon, because there was a noticeable decrease in divorce rates among other age groups.

Why are more elderly couples separating?

While this is an interesting trend, there are a number of possible explanations for this movement. Quite a number of elderly individuals are in second marriages. For people that have remarried, the divorce rate is nearly two and a half times greater. Second marriages create a wide variety of financial and familial challenges.

Another possible explanation is that people are living longer nowadays than in years past. When people’s life expectancy was not as long, it may have incentivized people to stick it out. But now, when people are in their 50s and 60s and have life expectancies into the 80s and 90s, it might make people question whether they want to remain in a stale marriage for 30 or 40 more years.

Societal attitudes towards divorce have also undergone tremendous change. It is no longer considered a stigma for a married couple to decide to go their separate ways after many years of marriage. Many prominent politicians have done just this. Presidential candidate Al Gore and Tipper Gore were married for 40 years and separated in 2010. Alabama governor Robert Bentley and Dianne were married for 50 years and filed for divorce just one month after their golden anniversary.

The Independent Woman

But the leading explanation for why divorce rates among the elderly are up is the changing status of women in society. AARP data reveals that 60 percent of women take the first step to initiate divorce proceedings. This represents a huge transformational shift that defies the traditional role of women.

As women become more financially independent and no longer rely on men for financial support, women have assumed a more liberated, empowered role in society. Avivah Wittenberg-Cox, 54, observes that,

“I think men don’t want to rock the boat, and they’ll put with a less-than ideal situation.”

Because women now have greater participation in civic and working life, they are less willing to settle for a mediocre situation. Instead, these women break from unsatisfying relationships and look for better or more fulfilling relationships in other people.

Empty Nest

There is ample support for the proposition that women are no longer willing to merely “settle.” Dr. Schwartz, a sociologist, has articulated that “Women have higher expectations for their emotional life.” Dr. Schwartz, age 70 herself, has attested to divorcing her husband of 23 years because “the marriage had run out of juice.”

By the time couples reach their golden years, the children are usually out of the picture. The oft-cited reason to keep together an unhappy marriage for the children’s sake is absent in the case where the children are grown up and living their own lives. Once the children are independent, many people feel that they no longer need to stay together “for the kids.”

Sometimes, after many years of marriage, couples simply grows apart. Celia Jeffries was married at the tender age of 20 and split with her husband after thirty-seven years of marriage. Ms. Jeffries explains that the reason for the break up was that “he went in one direction and I went in another.”

While some couples grow old and develop together, others experience that they begin to have less and less in common.  So, as other age demographics are sticking with marriage, it is a new pattern evidenced in America’s elderly population for finding hope even after society suggests they are ‘too old’ to find new love.