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October 12, 2015 By bandlaw

Top 10 Best Divorce Songs of All Time

Pop Stars Dancing

Pop Star Music ConcertTop 10 Best Songs for Divorce

We thought our clients would appreciate a light-hearted reprieve from the weight of divorce.  Things seem colossally off-balance during and after divorce.  Some of the best songs ever made were written after a breakup or divorce So, we’ve compiled a list of the best songs to celebrate your divorce.

10. “All the Single Ladies” – Beyonce

Okay, so Beyonce’s never been divorced. She’s still married to Jay-Z, thus proving that when both people have hundreds of millions of dollars in their own accounts, marriage can work. That doesn’t stop her from lighting up the club every night with this timeless anthem for empowerment and self-esteem. And guys – don’t worry. You can still do the dance.

9. “I Will Survive” – Gloria Gaynor

Going all the way back to the 70s, Gloria Gaynor lit up the disco era with her fiery proclamation of surviving a breakup. “I Will Survive!” This is obviously hit and absolute must for best divorce songs.  Gaynor was smart to eschew disco conventions that make a lot of the music from that era sound cheesy; here, Gaynor is soulful and emphatic, which is what makes this song truly timeless.

8. “Ramblin’ Man” – The Allman Brothers

Only someone who’s been divorced six times could write such a timeless hit about freedom. Greg Allman took his love woes one step further by deciding to marry Cher, the notorious diva of the Sonny & Cher divorce. There are more than a few hits in the Allman Brothers solid oeuvre that’d work here, but it’s best to pick the one without a 9-minute guitar solo.


7. “Separate Ways” – Journey

Rock Band

Let’s be honest here: “Don’t Stop Believin'” is a great song, but have you ever listened to the lyrics? Whirlwind romance works for a night, but there’s a reason small-town-boy and lonely girl never got a sequel song. “Separate Ways” is far more accurate, and carries on the immense vocals and hard-hitting guitar Journey is known for. It’s a definite favorite of Journey guitarist Neal Schon, who plays the hit with extra aplomb now that he’s been divorced four times.

6. “Blow Me (One Last Kiss)” – Pink

Not many artists deserve two entries on this list, but then again, not many artists are Pink. Even the title makes a direct statement, with its clever use of parenthesis to show what Pink really thinks of her long-ago lover. This is a song that really cuts to the heart of the matter, leaving one feeling completely confident in their choices, especially knowing Pink’s right there with them.

5. “Roses” – Outkast

There’s a lot of similarity between this song and Cee-Lo’s. Both are undeniably catchy tunes with a bit of fun vulgarity thrown in, none of which stopped them from becoming the top radio hits of their day. Singer Andre 3000 coats his disses in metaphors so hilarious that they have to be heard to be believed. It’s a song that you’ll be singing long after you’ve kicked them to the curb.

4. “F*** You” – Cee-Lo

The title is unpublishable. The artist isn’t the stereotypical pop star. And the song itself is way more upbeat than anyone would have expected. And yet, Cee-Lo’s “F*** You” was the runaway hit of 2010, coming off the artist’s hiatus following the break-up of his group, Gnarls Barkley. It also happened to follow his divorce, which is probably no coincidence.

3. “We Are Never Getting Back Together” – Taylor Swift

Taylor Swift has never been married, although at 25 she has plenty of time left to make that mistake. Still, the country-pop darling has had plenty of breakups in her past, at least one of which inspired her to write this anthem for the newly liberated. Maybe it’s that chorus that has made it so ubiquitous – sometimes you just have to yell the title to remind the world that your decisions are final.

Pop Stars Dancing

2. “So What” – Pink

Pink had just separated from her boyfriend of 7 years when she released the chart-topping hit “So What.” We can all relate with the aggressive melody and lyrics like “I’m not gonna pay his rent, I got a brand new attitude.” It’s no wonder why this song remains Pink’s top-selling single, and a definite favorite.

1. “Stronger” – Britney Spears

Britney Spears knows a thing or two about divorce. After a 2-day marriage to a backup dancer, she infamously married the utterly trashy Kevin Federline. Following her cringeworthy marriage, Britney’s rebounded completely, becoming a host on the X-Factor and going on a series of record-breaking tours. This Britney song, from her second album, encompasses everything she must have learned about life following her breakup.

So, friends, crank up your radio and take a gander at the brighter side of things.  Even filthy rich musicians have felt what you feel.

Filed Under: Uncategorized Tagged With: Best Songs for Divorce

July 20, 2015 By bandlaw

Cheaters caught on Ashley Madison

How Does Adultery Play In A Divorce?

Uncontested DivorceThe recent hack of the Ashley Madison website caused a release of private information online. Spouses who were planning on having (or had) affairs through the website may have been exposed, and the question of adultery comes up once again as it relates to divorce. Adultery is a common ground for divorce, but adultery is not an accusation you make without some sort of evidence.

#1: Suspected Adultery

Someone who suspects adultery may confront their spouse, but their spouse may deny everything. The information about their alleged affair may be destroyed, and any claim to be made in court lacks grounds for a divorce trial or settlement. The Ashley Madison leaks may provide evidence for spouses who have suspected adultery, but we do not know how much information was leaked.

#2: Proving Adultery

Private investigators have spent time finding evidence of adultery for their clients, and there may be electronic information that will prove adultery. You must bring all evidence you have before the court, and a judge will determine the validity of your case. Any case that does not have evidence will require other documentation to complete your claim.

#3: Speak With Your Attorney

You must speak with your attorney before you get too deep into the idea of divorce. Your attorney has a legal and ethical obligation to advise you of your options in a case. Lawyers will inform you of the merits of your case, and you may not choose to continue given the parameters set forth by your attorney.

#4: Do Your Own Research

You may use social media feeds and other evidence to prove adultery, but you must have an iron clad case to show to the court. Circumstantial evidence does not prove adultery in 2015. Men and women can be friends in 2015, and blind suspicion will not please the court. Your lawyer needs enough information to go to court with confidence, and you must take a step back before you start looking. Consider that your spouse may simply have friends you do not know.Filing for divorce on grounds of adultery is a legitimate legal claim, but you need something solid. The Ashley Madison website hack may provide evidence for some divorce claims, but every divorce claim is different. Ask your attorney for guidance before you begin proceedings, and present your lawyer with evidence that will give you confidence going into a courtroom with a judge.

Filed Under: Divorce Question

July 15, 2015 By bandlaw

Life as a Single Parent

What Will Life Be Like as a Single Parent?

Adoption
Parenthood is never an easy job. For single parents, there are additional challenges you may not have considered. To make life as easy easy as possible for you and your child, and to ease the transition to single parenthood, it’s important to develop a support system as well as to maintain as friendly a relationship as possible with the child’s other parent.

Expect the Unexpected

Things will come up that you haven’t even thought of. As your marriage deteriorated, you may have thought to yourself that your ex “didn’t do much anyway” and that it would be easier to be on your own for parenting. The truth is, you probably won’t realize how much the other person did until the help is gone.For instance, you will need to get yourself and your child up and ready for work and school on your own. You will be entirely responsible for getting your child to school and arranging after-school care or getting out of work early enough to also do pick-up.

When you get home, time to start a load of laundry and taken care of dinner. You will need to do all of that while helping your child with homework, shuttling her back and fourth to sports or club activities, and getting ready for the next day. On the plus side, if the home was very tense and stressful atmosphere prior to your divorce, that will also be absent from the home now.

One Person; Two Roles

When discipline problems arise, you have to be the bad guy and the good guy every time.  Try to do your best to be consistent even when you are exhausted and overwhelmed by your own emotions and fears. Finances keep you up at night.  Court-ordered child support can be a huge help for the custodial parent. It’s important to make sure an order is in place and to follow up with the family court system if it’s not being followed. You can also look into grants for single parents to allow you to go back to school and further your education to become better off financially.

Single parents often find themselves having to play the role of both parents, which can be a challenge for women who don’t love camping or men who aren’t fond of tea parties, but this can also be an opportunity for both parents to grow as people and expand their horizons. If one parent really hasn’t been involved, having one-on-one quality time for visitation can be beneficial for both parent and child, and the non-custodial parent may actually bloom as a parent when the time comes.

For the well-being of both parents and the child, there are some important things to keep in mind. While single parenthood can be challenging and a huge responsibility, it also has many rewards. If it is appropriate, keep in communication with your ex, and work together for the good of your child. Show respect for your child and give them as much love as you possibly can. Remember to support your child and be on his side, be his biggest cheerleader.

Lean on family and friends for help. Also consider joining a support group in your area for single parents, talking to others who are in a similar place in life can be very helpful.

Filed Under: Child Custody

July 13, 2015 By bandlaw

Save Time and Money on Divorce

Uncontested DivorceDivorce is hard enough without the added stress of lengthy wait times, burdensome costs and a court battle. It does not have to be that way. If you have done all that you can to salvage your marriage and there is no way to save it, uncontested divorce could be just right for you.

Who Can File for Uncontested Divorce?

Couples who have no assets, no property, no house, no joint debt, and no major child custody issues can pursue this alternative route.   Uncontested divorce is available only for people who have not been married long, perhaps less than five years. The amount and duration of any spousal support, or alimony, and division of all debt and property are major issues to consider in getting any divorce. Uncontested divorce works best if each spouse can support themselves or are clearly capable of doing so.

Separate laws govern child custody and child support agreements, but if the two parents can agree on their own, then they save time and money with an uncontested divorce. These include agreeing on how they will share parenting responsibilities and parenting time as well as amount and duration of child support.

Couples with more complex situations can proceed without a lawyer in uncontested divorce but should do so with great caution, as all agreements related to child custody and support must be in accordance with state and federal laws governing them. It is wise to seek advice from an attorney who specializes in divorce law who can ensure your agreements are within the constraints of it and you are not being taken advantage of by your spouse.

Are Uncontested Divorce and No-fault Divorce the Same?

They are not the same. Uncontested means the spouses have discussed everything they need to discuss and settled all their issues and concerns. No-fault refers to the grounds or reason for a divorce. It means your marriage is so irretrievably broken that there is no hope of mending it. In no-fault divorce, you may or may not necessarily agree on everything. It is a good idea to have an attorney who can verify the information your spouse has given and check to see if check for any obvious undisclosed-to-you assets.

Advantages

Uncontested divorce is simple, quick and the least expensive way to get divorced as long as it stays uncontested. Staying out of court is more private. This more cooperative approach keeps conflict to a minimum for all involved and gives a chance to end a marriage with dignity. It is cheaper because when you can reach agreement before filing.

Disadvantages

Uncontested divorce is not for everyone and can be dangerous for some. It is a bad idea when spouses, for a variety of reasons, are not able to talk to each other. If one or both of you are adamant about keeping anything in particular or a larger share of your marital assets, this can lead to a disagreement too unmanageable for an uncontested divorce proceeding. Uncontested divorce is risky in situations of domestic violence where one spouse may be vulnerable or feel too intimidated to speak for themselves.

Costs and Wait Times

This is the quickest and least costly way to get a divorce. You must file in the state where one of you live and in some only have to pay filing fees. Prices vary widely by state and depend on whether or not you use an attorney, but tend to cost between a few hundred to only a couple thousand. When you and your spouse are in agreement about major issues involved in divorce, it saves time and money for each to have an attorney review the paperwork before it is finalized.

Filed Under: Divorce Question

June 25, 2015 By bandlaw

Why It’s Hard for Fathers to Get Custody

Fathers Get Custody

Why is it so hard for fathers to get custody?

Fathers Get Custody
Fathers can get custody of their kids.

For divorcing parents who both want custody of a child, it is often more difficult for the father to get custody than for the mother. There are many different reasons that factor into this, despite the fact that courts may state they “do not discriminate” between fathers and mothers in hearing custody cases. For fathers seeking custody, what this can mean is working twice as hard try to level the playing field.

“Act as if” You Already Have Custody
One of the biggest factors that will influence how open a court is to the father’s case is evidence of your pre-existing bond with your child. Another huge influencer is your readiness to bring your child into your home. For fathers who may have just moved out of the family home, this means selecting and readying the new home as one which is suitable for raising a child.

Act as if you already have custody. Imagine your child is already living with you in your home. Evaluate your home for safety issues. Stock the fridge with foods your child likes. Take a look at any changes that may be required if your child lives with you, including the commute to day care/school and adjusting your work schedule accordingly. Start planning now for how you will handle those changes. This will do a lot to convince a judge you are serious about taking custody of your child.

Stay in your child’s life as much as you can (court permitting). Continue to pay child support promptly (even early!). Do your best to maintain a cordial relationship with your soon-to-be-ex. Remember important dates and show up for special events, games, performances and school conferences. Talk with your child (age permitting) and help them begin to prepare for and adjust to the changes that are coming.

Keep Accurate Records of EVERYTHING
Even as you are building your case for why you should seek custody, you must also remember the court runs on records and proof, not hearsay and stories. Do your best to record everything. Take photos of your time with your child. Save text messages and voice mails, letters, and postcards. Keep a visitation log of every visit you and your child have, including the time/date/length of the visit as well as where you go and what happens during the visit. Your child will likely be questioned as well during the court proceedings, and hearing of your continual involvement from your child will help the judge view your custody application more favorably.

Consider Asking for Joint Custody
While there may be circumstances indicating sole custody is the path truly in your child’s best interest, asking for joint custody at first may help to “soften up” the court’s position towards a father having sole custody.

It will show that you are willing to do whatever it takes to ensure your child has that all-important relationship with both parents if at all possible. It will indicate your willingness to work amicably with your spouse towards this goal (whether or not she demonstrates the same willingness towards you). It will indicate awareness that there may be times you won’t be able to be there in every way your child needs. While joint custody may not be your “ideal outcome,” it can definitely present a workable first step towards seeking full custody in situations where extreme court resistance to a father’s custody exists.

Hire an Attorney Skilled in Father Custody Matters
While all attorneys have to take certain steps to practice law (graduate law school, pass the bar, et al), this does not mean all attorneys are equally skilled at winning custody cases. Some attorneys may spend their entire career and never once handle a custody case, while others spend their days in and out of the court room totally focused on custody issues. So when you hire an attorney, you want to select one skilled in your specific type of case – a father seeking custody of his child.

As a father himself, Attorney Bruce Anderson understands the stakes.  With the help of an experienced family lawyer, you can steer the court toward a favorable outcome.

Filed Under: Child Custody, Paternity Tagged With: Fathers seeking child custody, Prepare for your custody hearing

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Divorce Attorney D. Bruce Anderson has been practicing family law in the state of Nevada for over 30 years. Bruce has worked as a sole practitioner emphasizing his area of expertise in Family Law in Las Vegas.

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