Life as a Single Parent

Parenthood is never an easy job. For single parents, there are additional challenges you may not have considered. To make life as easy easy as possible for you and your child, and to ease the transition to single parenthood, it’s important to develop a support system as well as to maintain as friendly a relationship as possible with the child’s other parent.

Things will come up that you haven’t even thought of. As your marriage deteriorated, you may have thought to yourself that your ex “didn’t do much anyway” and that it would be easier to be on your own for parenting. The truth is, you probably won’t realize how much the other person did until the help is gone.

For instance, you will need to get yourself and your child up and ready for work and school on your own. You will be entirely responsible for getting your child to school and arranging after-school care or getting out of work early enough to also do pick-up.

When you get home, time to start a load of laundry and taken care of dinner. You will need to do all of that while helping your child with homework, shuttling her back and fourth to sports or club activities, and getting ready for the next day. On the plus side, if the home was very tense and stressful atmosphere prior to your divorce, that will also be absent from the home now.

When discipline problems arise, you have to be the bad guy and the good guy every time.  Try to do your best to be consistent even when you are exhausted and overwhelmed by your own emotions and fears.

Finances keep you up at night.  Court-ordered child support can be a huge help for the custodial parent. It’s important to make sure an order is in place and to follow up with the family court system if it’s not being followed. You can also look into grants for single parents to allow you to go back to school and further your education to become better off financially.

Single parents often find themselves having to play the role of both parents, which can be a challenge for women who don’t love camping or men who aren’t fond of tea parties, but this can also be an opportunity for both parents to grow as people and expand their horizons. If one parent really hasn’t been involved, having one-on-one quality time for visitation can be beneficial for both parent and child, and the non-custodial parent may actually bloom as a parent when the time comes.

For the well-being of both parents and the child, there are some important things to keep in mind. While single parenthood can be challenging and a huge responsibility, it also has many rewards. If it is appropriate, keep in communication with your ex, and work together for the good of your child. Show respect for your child and give them as much love as you possibly can. Remember to support your child and be on his side, be his biggest cheerleader.

Lean on family and friends for help. Also consider joining a support group in your area for single parents, talking to others who are in a similar place in life can be very helpful.