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October 12, 2015 By bandlaw

Top 10 Best Divorce Songs of All Time

Pop Stars Dancing

Pop Star Music ConcertTop 10 Best Songs for Divorce

We thought our clients would appreciate a light-hearted reprieve from the weight of divorce.  Things seem colossally off-balance during and after divorce.  Some of the best songs ever made were written after a breakup or divorce So, we’ve compiled a list of the best songs to celebrate your divorce.

10. “All the Single Ladies” – Beyonce

Okay, so Beyonce’s never been divorced. She’s still married to Jay-Z, thus proving that when both people have hundreds of millions of dollars in their own accounts, marriage can work. That doesn’t stop her from lighting up the club every night with this timeless anthem for empowerment and self-esteem. And guys – don’t worry. You can still do the dance.

9. “I Will Survive” – Gloria Gaynor

Going all the way back to the 70s, Gloria Gaynor lit up the disco era with her fiery proclamation of surviving a breakup. “I Will Survive!” This is obviously hit and absolute must for best divorce songs.  Gaynor was smart to eschew disco conventions that make a lot of the music from that era sound cheesy; here, Gaynor is soulful and emphatic, which is what makes this song truly timeless.

8. “Ramblin’ Man” – The Allman Brothers

Only someone who’s been divorced six times could write such a timeless hit about freedom. Greg Allman took his love woes one step further by deciding to marry Cher, the notorious diva of the Sonny & Cher divorce. There are more than a few hits in the Allman Brothers solid oeuvre that’d work here, but it’s best to pick the one without a 9-minute guitar solo.


7. “Separate Ways” – Journey

Rock Band

Let’s be honest here: “Don’t Stop Believin'” is a great song, but have you ever listened to the lyrics? Whirlwind romance works for a night, but there’s a reason small-town-boy and lonely girl never got a sequel song. “Separate Ways” is far more accurate, and carries on the immense vocals and hard-hitting guitar Journey is known for. It’s a definite favorite of Journey guitarist Neal Schon, who plays the hit with extra aplomb now that he’s been divorced four times.

6. “Blow Me (One Last Kiss)” – Pink

Not many artists deserve two entries on this list, but then again, not many artists are Pink. Even the title makes a direct statement, with its clever use of parenthesis to show what Pink really thinks of her long-ago lover. This is a song that really cuts to the heart of the matter, leaving one feeling completely confident in their choices, especially knowing Pink’s right there with them.

5. “Roses” – Outkast

There’s a lot of similarity between this song and Cee-Lo’s. Both are undeniably catchy tunes with a bit of fun vulgarity thrown in, none of which stopped them from becoming the top radio hits of their day. Singer Andre 3000 coats his disses in metaphors so hilarious that they have to be heard to be believed. It’s a song that you’ll be singing long after you’ve kicked them to the curb.

4. “F*** You” – Cee-Lo

The title is unpublishable. The artist isn’t the stereotypical pop star. And the song itself is way more upbeat than anyone would have expected. And yet, Cee-Lo’s “F*** You” was the runaway hit of 2010, coming off the artist’s hiatus following the break-up of his group, Gnarls Barkley. It also happened to follow his divorce, which is probably no coincidence.

3. “We Are Never Getting Back Together” – Taylor Swift

Taylor Swift has never been married, although at 25 she has plenty of time left to make that mistake. Still, the country-pop darling has had plenty of breakups in her past, at least one of which inspired her to write this anthem for the newly liberated. Maybe it’s that chorus that has made it so ubiquitous – sometimes you just have to yell the title to remind the world that your decisions are final.

Pop Stars Dancing

2. “So What” – Pink

Pink had just separated from her boyfriend of 7 years when she released the chart-topping hit “So What.” We can all relate with the aggressive melody and lyrics like “I’m not gonna pay his rent, I got a brand new attitude.” It’s no wonder why this song remains Pink’s top-selling single, and a definite favorite.

1. “Stronger” – Britney Spears

Britney Spears knows a thing or two about divorce. After a 2-day marriage to a backup dancer, she infamously married the utterly trashy Kevin Federline. Following her cringeworthy marriage, Britney’s rebounded completely, becoming a host on the X-Factor and going on a series of record-breaking tours. This Britney song, from her second album, encompasses everything she must have learned about life following her breakup.

So, friends, crank up your radio and take a gander at the brighter side of things.  Even filthy rich musicians have felt what you feel.

Filed Under: Uncategorized Tagged With: Best Songs for Divorce

June 18, 2015 By bandlaw

Scared to Ask for a Divorce

Scared To Ask for Divorce
Scared To Ask for Divorce
Unsure how to ask your partner for divorce can feel like standing on a cliff.

If you’ve been thinking about getting a divorce, your most overwhelming feeling is going to be fear – and that is perfectly natural. After all, you have been used to being “us” and now you’re thinking about becoming “I.” That can feel like you are stepping off a cliff without any knowledge of what awaits you.

First, understand that your emotions are going to be extreme. Very few people really enjoy confrontation, so if you’ve put off broaching the subject, it is likely that marital tensions have risen higher. There is the fear of hurting your partner with your decision, the uncertainty of financial repercussions and, if you have children, the reluctance to put them through this trauma.

The truth is that waiting until you feel the time is perfect is just a way of stalling because there will never be a perfect time. Now that you’ve made the decision, there are some sensible and sensitive ways to go approach this process.

Who You Are

First, remain true to yourself. This will help you start to build the post-divorce you in a strong and balanced way. There is bound to be disagreement but that doesn’t mean you have to abandon your personal standards. In other words, don’t get into the gutter with your soon-to-be ex even if that is what he or she seems determined to do.
There’s an old saying, “Why should I bark when I have a dog?” Well, why should you get all worked up when you have a lawyer who can handle the situation with objectivity while still advocating for you?

Your lawyer may suggest a mediator, and it’s a very good idea. This objective person can help you make equitable decisions about property, money, etc.

How to Tell Your Spouse

For some reason, people seem to think that breaking the news in a public place like a restaurant will keep emotions in check. Not true. This is one of the most personal decisions you will ever make, and it deserves to be done in quiet and civil surroundings. Send the kids to grandma’s house, turn off the cell phones and create an atmosphere of calm.

If it is impossible to deal with your spouse for any number of reasons, remember once again that you have a lawyer.

Freedom

You haven’t reached this crisis point without a lot of emotional and psychological stress, and there is no reason that you shouldn’t relieve yourself of this enormous burden you’ve been carrying. What applies to you also applies to your partner and your children. Kids are always aware of tensions in the home, and they often start to feel scared and upset by what they are sensing before anyone ever mentions splitting up. Having this out in the open will allow you to talk to your children and reassure them that they are still loved and still your priority.

And your spouse has probably been in nearly as much turmoil as you. So be kind and tell them clearly that you know that your happiness depends on you, not on them, and set them free from the responsibility they may feel. Even if the divorce is full-speed ahead, this is a good time to seek help from family counselors who are used to dealing with the pain and grief that accompanies divorce.

Stressed about bills

Finances

Children and money are the two most problematic and worrisome aspects of divorce; indeed, they are often the excuses made for not getting out of a toxic relationship before you’ve frayed your last nerve.

When it comes to finances, fight for what is rightfully yours, but remind yourself that there is no terrible situation that can be fixed with money, and that living on less but being happy is worth everything. While it may be hard to believe during the divorce, this change is paving the way to future happiness, even if it means living in a smaller house.

A Brighter Future

Divorce can actually propel you into re-energizing and reinventing yourself. Yes, you may mourn the loss of your partner on some levels, but allow yourself to get excited about projects, trips and goals that may have slipped far away during the marriage. Go blonde, learn ballroom dancing or climb Everest – start exploring what the world holds for you and allow yourself to feel how exciting that can be.

Filed Under: Uncategorized Tagged With: Asking For Divorce, How To Ask For Divorce

June 17, 2015 By bandlaw

Coping with Divorce

Married Couple Arguing
Married Couple Arguing
Coping with divorce can be a struggle.

Many people find that divorce is one of the most difficult things that they have to go through in their lives. Anxiety, sadness, anger and fear are some of the emotions that people experience after they go through a divorce. Self-talk is one of the ways that people cope with the pain of a divorce.

While positive self-talk can make it easier for one to get through a divorce, there are things that people tell themselves that are not true. Below is a list of some of the things that people often say to themselves after going through a divorce:

I Love My New Life

Many people see their divorce as a time to start fresh and accomplish new things. However, adjusting to life after divorce can still be very difficult. If you are having a very hard time adjusting to your new life, then you may want to reach out to family members and friends. It takes some time to heal, and you want to surround yourself with people who care about you during this time.

I Do Not Want To Get Married Again

Many people are so hurt after a divorce that they vow to never give love again. They tell themselves that they are not open to meeting anyone else in order to protect themselves from hurt. It is estimated that 80 percent of people who get divorced will eventually remarry, so there is a strong possibility you actually will re-marry however slim the chances feel right now.

I Do Not Care About My Ex Anymore

People often tell themselves that they could care less about their ex. Deep down, that is usually not true. You have spent a significant amount of time with your ex, so he or she was a big part of your life. That is why you will probably always care about him or her.


I Do Not Like Being Away From My Kids

Divorcing parents are often required to spend time away from their children. Many parents feel guilty about admitting that they might enjoy spending time away from their children. Even though you love your kids and value spending time with them, you do need a break. It is okay to enjoy your alone time. Spending some time away from your kids allows you to focus on doing nice things for yourself.

My Life Is Messed Up Because Of My Ex-Spouse

It is normal to feel like your life is completely messed up after going through a divorce. Divorce is a major change, but you will get through it. Everyone’s timeline for grieving the end of a marriage varies. Additionally, you cannot blame your ex for things that go wrong in your life.

Meeting Someone Would Help My Life Fall Into Place

Many people believe that the best way to get their lives together is to meet someone new. However, now is the time to focus on yourself, your career, hobbies and children. Chances are, you will meet someone after everything else falls into place. The idea is that by casting a light upon yourself, you can step into your full potential as a well-rounded person.

Filed Under: Uncategorized Tagged With: Coping with Divorce

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Divorce Attorney D. Bruce Anderson has been practicing family law in the state of Nevada for over 30 years. Bruce has worked as a sole practitioner emphasizing his area of expertise in Family Law in Las Vegas.

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